We have all been there, working hard, taking action and feeling good until suddenly we enter with new territory and then BANG everything starts to feel funky, old thought patterns kick in, we start questioning our abilities, feel unclear about what to do next and we start to lose our focus, our flow, procrastination kicks in and bit by bit we stop moving!!!!
Please welcome Self sabotage!!!
Sabotage is when we experience inner conflict and the conscious and subconscious mind battle with one another. Despite consciously talking about wanting better health, more wealth and greater happiness, subconsciously we are doing everything we can to ensure this never happens. Although we feel we are doing everything right, we are in fact setting ourselves up for failure, we just can’t see it.
Over the years I have seen this happen to just about everyone I know at some point in their life and is something I consciously have to keep on top off. Self sabotage is highly destructive and unfortunately very common, especially when it comes to money and success.
We have every intention to reach new levels of success and hit more financial targets but old habits and patterns creep in, affecting out thoughts and keeping us tight in our familiar bubble.
It is only when we become aware of what is happening that we can start to do the inner work to break it down and let it go, until that point we will
always going to struggle to become a deliberate creator of your life and have the money and abundance you desire.
What does self sabotage look like?
• Procrastination – you know that you should be doing something, but you constantly put it off.
• Not doing something that you know is good for you – getting enough sleep, drinking water, eating a balanced diet, taking your supplements, going to the gym, taking a break.
• Giving into fear – the fear can make you believe that you will make bad decisions, that people might judge you or that you could fail.
• Addictions – using drugs, drink, cigarettes, caffeine, sugar and junk food to ‘numb out’.
• Conflict – life is flowing, money is coming in and you are feeling pretty happy with yourself. This is an unfamiliar feeling for you and so you decide to create some drama!
• Playing down your abilities – when you start playing down your abilities to others and yourself, you don’t have to step into that next version of you.
• Putting obstacles and challenges in your path – and making them bigger and more complicated than they need to be.
• Negative self talk – when you tell yourself that you can’t do something, or shouldn’t do something you are playing into the hands of self sabotage. Your conscious mind starts to believe that you are not smart enough, clever enough, or good enough and so it keeps you trapped.
Why do we self sabotage?
It is often as a result of our past and linked with past thought patterns, events or experiences that have left a mark of us and affected the why we think, feel and believe in ourselves:
• Self Worth/Esteem. We don’t believe we deserve success/Money/Happiness etc. so when life suddenly looks and feels too good for us, we begin to self sabotage to take it back down to a level that feels comfortable and acceptable.
• Limiting beliefs – if our predominant thoughts are negative and are limiting, we will allow ourselves to believe the negative thoughts, such as; I am too old, I am not clever enough, I can’t earn money that easily and good things don’t happen to people like me.
• Familiarity. We have become so used to acting in this way that we despite not liking how this makes us feel its oddly comforting to keep putting ourselves in this position. We know what it feels like and for the most part how to handle it. fYou’ve probably been there your whole life,
• Imposter Syndrome – We start to worry what others will think and question who we think we are to have the money/ success and happiness we want. As the stakes get higher and higher and you take on more responsibility at work, or do something that raises your public profile, you feel you only have further to fall. You think if you call attention to yourself by being successful, it’ll be more likely that you’re called out as a fraud.
• We are driven by perfectionism – we are so scared of failing and everything not being perfect, that we decide it is less emotionally painful to stay stuck in life.
Love as Always